With the new year comes resolutions of all shapes and sizes, and most are broken before the year is over.
According to statistics from Dr. Stephen Kraus of RealScienceofSuccess.com, more than 15 percent of you will break those tender, good-at-heart promises within the first week. If you can’t pull it together for 2007, here is a fail-proof back-up plan for the struggling, resolution-less Loyola student.
1. QUIT
The most obvious, top five, desert island resolution is to “quit.” A good place to start might be giving up on smoking. But be realistic about your habit.
You probably won’t last an hour if you’ve decided that this is the year to quit smoking if you’re the five-packs-a-day type. School is starting again, so you’re guaranteed to give in to stress and light up at some point, but it may be a good time to stop now before the government bans it all together.
Non-locals (and the uninformed) might want to know that 2007 kicked off the Louisiana Smoke-Free Air Act, which prohibits smoking in most public spaces. In the near future you may be detained by “Big Brother’s Smoke Patrol” (or you could just give up now and save yourself the $25 to $100 fine and possible lawsuit).
For the non-smokers, you may want to consider stepping away from the Guitar Hero. Apply that trained hand-eye coordination to something productive, or you know, actual guitar.
If these require too much commitment, start with something smaller and easier to control.
For example, your obsessive stalking and browsing habits on social-networking Web sites like Facebook or MySpace have probably grown out-of-control without school interrupting your online time, and you are going to be easily distracted once your professor informs you that Blackboard is his teaching medium of choice. If you can’t quit cold turkey, keep track of how much time you spend online and decrease that time each day. If you can get through the withdrawal, the depression and the paranoia, you’ll be a healthy member of the Internet within just a few months. At least it’s a starting point.
2. LOSE WEIGHT
The Center for Disease Control finds that about 66 percent of Americans are overweight. That covers pretty much everybody you know: your friends, parents, most of your classmates, professors – everybody.
The only people left are the really loud girls in your philosophy class who constantly complain about how much their spine sticks out. You know what? Forget this one for once. You’re probably fine, and totally normal, but maybe try some fruits and vegetables a few times a day. You’ll be surprised with how much better you’ll feel.
Contrary to popular opinion, eating healthy does not require a lack of personal hygiene, a change in sexual preference, or a membership to the Animal Liberation Front. At least you will never have to deal with another McDonald’s-induced bathroom trip.
Stay away from the spine girl and hang out with some determined, open-minded, borderline husky people like you – you’ll be in shape in no time. Or be on a meat and chocolate diet and swear that it works. Either way, you’re trying, and that’s what counts.
3. MAKE A TO-DO LIST
Remember that road trip you have been talking about? Or the organizing you’ve been meaning to do? There is a laundry list of things you have been putting off, and once you start writing them down, the more eager you will be to get them done. Give yourself something to look forward to – a reward for your hard work during the semester.
That stack of books you’ve been meaning to read is only getting bigger, so read a few pages every night before you fall asleep. You may not remember what you were reading, but a well-worn book looks impressive on your bookshelf. The drool stains and slept-on creases on the pages give it the coveted “well-read” look.
4. GET A JOB
The Department of Labor indicates more than 400,000 Americans are not actively seeking employment.
Though you may be a hard-working bookworm with little time for extracurriculars, New Orleans is the ideal city for students seeking available, flexible part-time jobs. Even fast food restaurants are advertising $10 an hour with a signage bonus and benefits. Not only will you be able to eat all the fried chicken you want, you can afford to treat your significant other to a nice dinner and provide decent gratuity for your fellow service industry men and women (seriously, another resolution: learn to tip at least 18 percent, it’s common courtesy, and your food will be spit-free).
Keep your eye open at your favorite coffee shops and restaurants now that schools are back in session and working students have to free up some extra shifts. If the service industry isn’t your bag, you’ll be happy to know that volunteer programs are always willing to have someone on board.
5. TRY SOMETHING NEW
Guitar, piano, painting, foreign language, even Guitar Hero – just give something else a shot so your weekend isn’t an endless, slurred carnival of drunk.
Instead of replying “I’m going out” when your peers ask what you’re doing tonight, let them know you’re volunteering at a soup kitchen, or taking interpretive dance classes.
Try getting off the phone, give your thumbs a rest and write a letter or send a postcard to your friends and family. Stamps are only 39 cents, and paper is pretty much free at Loyola, considering how much is used in the Monroe Library printers. Even your trusty cell phone is getting into the New Year’s resolution industry, as companies like Thumbplay.com offer “motivational” messages sent to your phone to keep your head in the game. If you really need to have your phone tell you what to do, you’re clearly in need of some help.
Get creative, combine your ideas. Maybe you can read about how to quit smoking and then apply it. That’s two resolutions in one, and that’s way ahead of most people. You’ll turn the statistics upside-down, you little over-achiever, you.
Alex Woodward can be reached at [email protected].
Losing all that extra belly weight around the midsection is a common New Year’s resolution most people make but often break within the first week. This year, Loyola students can take a different approach to resolution making and keeping. (Michael Nissman and Steve Kashishian)
