It’s 4 a.m., and you’re leaving your favorite bar. You’re stumbling drunk, your friends are drunk and all of you need to sober up immediately for the drive — or walk — home. You are also hungry, but it seems like the 24-hour McDonalds on Louisiana (the one where the cashier screams “No hamburgers, baby,” after 3:30 a.m. and laughs at you as you drive up past the windows) or one of those greasy IHOPs are too far from where you are, and you don’t trust yourself to get there safely. Right? Wrong. We’ve compiled a list of four, trustworthy and delicious late night spots for you to get your drunken eat on — that are fresh, not frozen. And best of all, they are all within walking or streetcar riding distance, in case you’re just too drunk for your car keys.

Café Du Monde
800 Decatur St.
New Orleans, LA, 70116
http://www.
cafedumonde.com

A New Orleans favorite, this 174-year-old coffee and beignet stand, located in the French Market, is an ideal place to sober up with sugared bread and hot coffee. The menu is simple: beignets come in orders of three, and orange juice, hot or iced coffee, Cafe’ Au Lait (coffee and milk) and fountain drinks come in small, medium or large cups. The place is usually packed, day or night, so if you’re lucky enough to snag a seat, please, don’t puke on the patrons next to you. Unless it’s powdered sugar, sharing isn’t caring.
-Jessica Williams

Clover Grill
900 Bourbon St.
New Orleans, LA, 70116
http://www.
clovergrill.com

You haven’t had a burger until you’ve had a hubcap burger. Known city-wide for their uniquely broiled beef, this little eatery offers not only great-tasting burgers (broiled under an actual hub cap), but also a home-style breakfast — huge waffles, topped anyway you like them, eggs and omelets, bacon and old-fashioned cheese grits. Clover Grill is also known nation-wide — you may vaguely remember seeing Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett sitting down for some of the grill’s coffee in December’s blockbuster “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.” Best of all, the location is ideal — down the Big Easy’s most notorious street, where you might party hard anyway.
-Jessica Williams

The Trolley Stop
1923 St. Charles Ave.
New Orleans, La, 70130

There’s only one trolley in New Orleans, and it’s easy to take a streetcar to get to it. The Trolley Stop Café, located on the corner of St. Charles Avenue and St. Andrew Street, is a safe bet for delicious diner food. The streetcar-shaped joint boasts a remarkably vast breakfast menu and authentic New Orleans seafood plates — all served into the wee hours of the morning. Most plates are priced under $10, with a full meal often costing less than $15. One of the most popular items, the Trolley Special — two eggs, two pancakes, two strips of bacon or sausage, and grits — only costs $6.25, and is more than worth the money. The Trolley Stop Café operates 24 hours Thursday, Friday and Saturday, and are open 6 a.m. – 2 p.m. Sunday through Wednesday — perfect for following up weekend bar hops.
-Kevin Zansler

Crépes À La Cart
1039 Broadway St
New Orleans, LA 70118
http://www.
crepesalacarts.com

From strawberry and fresh cream crepes to salmon and cream cheese crepes, this corner crepe shop has everything you need for when you grow sick of yeasty Boot pizza. The place serves crepes, hot or iced coffee or tea, hot tea, hot chocolate or ice cream. They stay open until 3 a.m. or later most nights, and they play fun music in the background so you can keep your drunken sway going. Just don’t drop your crepe on the concrete floor, because it ain’t coming back.
-Jessica Williams

Jessica Williams can be reached at
[email protected].
Kevin Zansler can be reached at
[email protected].

Clover Grill

Café Du Monde

The Trolley Shop