As a new semester, a new year, and a new decade dawned, I entered the world of Loyola with hope that maybe, just maybe, things would be different. The air would be fresher, the classes would be easier and the food in the OR would become five-star gourmet grub. But, alas, not much has changed in the weeks since I left this all-too-familiar academic breeding ground. Things are just as annoying as ever. One thing in particular gets under my skin though, and I don’t think I can take another day of it. It’s time I explain the Art of Walking.
Most of us have two decades of practice under our belts, but it seems that some people at Loyola—myself included—still haven’t mastered the skill of walking efficiently.
I can’t count the number of times that I’ve wanted to punch people in the back of head as I try to make my way to class (though I have a bit of a rage problem, so my feelings may be a bit of an overreaction). I’m sure that everyone has experienced that infuriating frustration that comes from picking one’s way through a throng of college students who apparently have nowhere to go. So I thought I’d take the time here to give a few pointers:
1. Don’t walk and text, especially in crowded places such as the Danna Center. Don’t walk and read, either. Although I know that the latest issue of The Maroon is difficult to put down, wait until you can sit before you dig in.
2. Don’t stand and talk in major walkways. It’s not hard to take two steps to the side to get out of the flow of traffic.
3. Don’t walk three and four in a line across hallways and sidewalks. Allow room for people to pass. Getting to class shouldn’t be reminiscent of games of Red Rover . Those memories are already too painful to remember.
4. Just because you aren’t in a hurry doesn’t mean everyone behind you wants to walk at a snail’s pace. You don’t have to run or even walk any faster than normal, but let people get around you and try not to block them.
5. Let people out before going in. This applies to classrooms, bathrooms, elevators, etc. The two seconds it takes to let people out won’t make a difference, so just hold your horses and stand aside.
6. Don’t walk and smoke. You become the head of a second-hand smoke train, blowing fumes into the faces of everyone behind you.
7. Pay attention! Look where you are going! Keep your eyes ahead and your mind at least somewhat focused on the task at hand.
Walking from class to class should not be tantamount to some crazy Japanese TV show obstacle course. But some days it feels like just that. I hope that at least some of what I’ve said makes a difference, but until it does, I’d better grab my helmet and knee pads before heading into the fray.
Rebekah Locke can be reached at [email protected]
