There’s a fine line between love and hate, between having fun and being easy. And on a campus as compact as Loyola’s, former lovers and people having bad hookups blur it all the time.

Take, for example, history junior “Scarlett” and a Sunday morning after a night with her boyfriend.

They wake up in a hurry, the 6 a.m. sky still gray, both getting dressed hastily so that he makes it to work on time and so she can meet her girlfriends for brunch in the Orleans Room. It is, after all, her freshman year.

“Scarlett” didn’t really have time to take inventory of her wardrobe. Was anything inside out? Not that it mattered, anyone she knew wouldn’t be up this early? It’d be easy to sneak back into Buddig with her dignity intact.

That was the case until she got off the St. Charles Avenue streetcar and crossed the street, cleared Marquette’s arches and got into the Palm Court.

There, she bumps into Sister Madonna – the resident chaplain of Buddig, someone she’d prayed and meditated with at the Awakening retreat.

“My heart jumped into my throat,” “Scarlett” said. “I’m thinking, ‘Did she see me? Do I have enough time to run?'”

It turned out that she didn’t.

“Sister Madonna looked at me, smiled, and she said ‘Hi,'” she said. “But I realized that after she looked at me kind of funny – like, up and down.”

So “Scarlett” speeds past the embarrassing encounter, the glance nagging her.

Somewhere around Bobet’s Ignatius Chapel, she decides to examine her wardrobe.

“I realized that my shirt was on backwards and upside down,” “Scarlett” said.

Within seconds of her realization, the Rev. Eddie Gros, S.J., himself spots her and bids her a good morning.

“At this point, I’m blushing and thinking, ‘Great who else am I gonna see? The whole world’s going to know that I didn’t come home last night.'”

But it’s not all simply embarrassment when someone sees you getting back from “handling business,” or what’s generally referred to in dorm halls across America as the “walk of shame.” Not when you’re particularly proud of the boyfriend – the same one, mind you, says “Scarlett” – you handled it with.

“My friend had dropped me off in front of the Rec Plex from this formal I went to with him. I had to wear a long gown that I stuffed into this purse she let me borrow – it was a Frida Kahlo bag, it was huge.”

“Scarlett” was wearing a black strapless bra under the white “wife-beater” her boyfriend had let her borrow accented by baggy, navy blue fleece sweatpants and silver stilettos – at noon, on a weekend.

“Last night’s make-up was all over my eyes like a racoon’s, but still, that (trip to Buddig) I don’t call the walk of shame. That I call the ‘stride of pride,'” “Scarlett” said, no matter how small Loyola’s campus is.

“If guys can do it, so can I.”

WHEN IT’S OVER …

It gets less light-hearted when it comes to former long-term lovers.

“Halle,” a psychology sophomore, dated a Loyola male for one-and-a-half years, their love igniting while he was at an out-of-state school.

“He transferred here for me,” she said.

Hurricane Katrina subsequently moved them in together and doomed their relationship, she said.

“Because we lived together, we got too close and just got annoyed with each other. I was no longer attracted to him because we were like brother and sister,” she said.

When they returned to New Orleans after the hurricane semester, they split – but on a campus this size, they see each other as much as “three times a week.”

“Some days we walk right by each other. Sometimes we’ll stop and say hello but he’ll usually storm off,” “Halle” said.

“I think it’s sad we don’t talk anymore, but sometimes he’s an a——, and he doesn’t deserve to talk to me.”

Is she embarrassed to have dated him?

“No one really knows who he is, so I’m not,” “Halle” said. “I know he avoids me, though. I just go around doing my thing. If he wants to avoid me, he can. I mean, this is my turf.”

Though less emotionally taxing, avoiding one-night stands gets grouped in with the this-campus-is-so-damn-small gripe.

So, music junior “Eva” said, “I don’t avoid guys. Things are only awkward if you make it awkward. It is what you make it. If it’s casual, it’s not necessary to hide it.”

Eva feels that being friends after an imprudent hook-up is not something natural. “You have to make an effort to be friends.”

If they don’t want to be friends: “You have to shrug it off. It was what it was and you just move on, don’t try to duck it.”

… DUCK AND COVER

For males, however, avoiding is a must – an absolute priority.

Whether it’s an ex-girlfriend, her creepy roommate you slept with to avenge the fact that she dumped you, or an ill-advised hook-up, sane males generally split and duck all three scenarios at all costs. Whether it’s one or all three at once, ducking is the way to go.

Here’s a male mantra to bank on for those whose once flourishing romances since barreled off the Huey P.: “Two former lovers that are still friends are either still in love or never were.”

That person you loved is no longer alive – accept that, and then you’ll realize you need their friendship like you need a cavity.

To get to opposite ends of campus, take either West Road or Calhoun to flank the “former-wifey” populated Smoker’s Alley. It’s so out of the way from Bobet and Miller, she won’t be found.

Avoid the O.R. at peak hours. Only eat there unless absolutely necessary and only minutes before they close. Hope she doesn’t know the Underground’s open.

Venture into the quads and the O.R. only when you’re up for a display of defiance; don’t be on the lookout. But if she crosses your eyesight, grasp that new honey of yours with the smokin’ bod that you’re brandishing and look right through her.

Keep your posture straight, suck in the gut and jut the pecs out.

If she’s with that guy she’s rebounding on, make eye contact with him at all costs. Keep a smirk on your face and wink at him.

That’s right. Wink.

That’s a deafening message: It tells him you did things to her he doesn’t have the imagination to fathom, and whatever she’s doing to him, you taught her.

At worst, the encounter will ruin your day.

At best, you’ll erupt a brawl.

And there’s a fifty-fifty chance you’ll knock his teeth out.

Then she’ll really be glad she dumped you.

But he won’t.

Ramon Vargas can be reached at [email protected].