Everything is new and exciting during the first year of college. A month goes by, then two, and then you start wondering, “Why am I still single?” The last edition of The Maroon explored the “reasons” behind this mystery. Needless to say, I felt slightly perturbed with the article. Why are we placing so much importance on relationships? And why is alcohol such a huge factor in the beginning of a relationship?
Our society as a whole has trained us to believe that once we hit puberty we must have a significant other to make us happy. Why? Why, when we enter a new atmosphere, like college, do both sexes feel they have to be in a relationship right off the bat?
No one really knows the answer to this question. Maybe it is our fear of solitude. Here on Loyola’s campus, there is not much to choose from. This is true – the ratio between men and women doesn’t allow for everyone to find “the right one.” Has society regressed a few decades and made us feel the need to find our life partner at such a young age? You’re at school for a reason. We’re here to grow intellectually and physically as individuals.
These are the best years of our lives, especially in this city.
Does it really matter in the grand scheme of things if the instant you enter college you do not find a significant other? Don’t get me wrong, I know relationships are new and exciting. The absence of loneliness feels great, so does being able to share with someone else what happened during the day. But unless you are one of the few lucky ones who miraculously finds love at a bar after having six beers, I suggest you move on. It may feel awkward being alone when it seems everyone else is paired up, but that situation can’t last forever. Give it time.
This leads me to my next point: In the article a student was quoted as saying, “If we could all manage to pull ourselves away from the triumvirate of drunkenness, we could probably find people with common interests other than beer.”
This is true; we are dependent on substances to interact with other people. When did we become unable to interact as human beings without the help of a drink to loosen us up? Going out and meeting new people in a setting with alcohol is not all bad, but this usually is not the ideal setting for a long-lasting relationship.
Once you get past your freshman year, your social spectrum will widen. You will have lived in the city for a year. You will feel more comfortable venturing outside of the college realm of locales. You’ll learn that there are so many more amazing places and people than Tuck’s, Quill’s and the Boot have to offer.
Finally, even though you may think you have the ideal relationship that nothing can come between, things happen. The story I am about to tell is one many of you have experienced or have heard. You find a special someone in your first year of college. Everything is working out well and then summer rolls around. Suddenly, your boy/girlfriend starts freaking out. “Baby, you know I love you. I can’t handle the long distance thing. Oh baby, please believe me. It’s not that I want to see other people, I just can’t handle not seeing you for three months.”
It is sad to see people fall for this story constantly, friends and myself included. To quote Family Guy, “I have two strong words for you: come on, come on.” Don’t go into a relationship expecting it last through the summer. Long distance relationships, at any age, are extremely difficult to maintain. Take it one day at a time.
If you’re going to make the leap into a relationship, don’t do it for the sake of having a label. Make sure that person is worth it, and there is more to your relationship than beer and sex.
Natalia Barquet is a mass communication sophomore from San Juan, Puerto Rico.
