Violence against women – rape, date rape, incest, sexual harassment, domestic violence – is as American as apple pie.

Every time we open the newspaper, talk to our friends or watch television, we hear about victims, overwhelmingly women, who are ashamed, humiliated, and left blaming themselves for the crimes committed against them.

Our culture is a rape culture: One in three women will be the victim of sexual violence in her life; a woman is raped every 15 seconds.

A college woman is far more likely to be forced into non-consensual sexual encounters than an average woman, and a victim will most likely have her sexual history scrutinized so that the burden of proof falls upon her rather than the perpetrator.

A woman’s attacker will most often either avoid punishment or receive a shorter sentence than someone convicted under mandatory drug sentencing laws.

These sobering statistics demonstrate that violence against women is part of our lives, part of our daily reality, and deeply ingrained in our collective and individual psyches.

The sad reality is that sexual violence is systemic.

It is woven into our daily lives and upheld by our cultural institutions, so much that the boundaries between violence and sexuality are blurred.

The victims and the crimes are often ignored or minimalized by our legal system, our educational systems, and even our religions.

Sexual violence continues not only in the crimes perpetuated against women, but also more insidiously in the minds of women who, because they fear more violence, often can’t live up to their full potential.

In short, our acceptance of sexual violence, the way we punish offenders and the way we treat its victims have been woven into the fabric of our society.

Because sexual violence is most often an unspeakable and unreported crime that goes unpunished, violence against women keeps in place those power relations that deem women lesser than, and inferior to, men. The consequence is a perpetuation of a culture of patriarchy and woman-hating.

Fighting against violence toward women, raising our voices to Take Back The Night as we did Tuesday night will only be successful if our actions combine to support the struggle for women’s liberation and equality, to reach the goal of social justice for all.

Only in a world where everyone can exercise self-determination, only in a world in which difference is not an excuse for assault, can we teach non-violence and respect, as well as enact laws that protect women and their children from daily and random violence in their lives.

Tuesday night we came together to remind ourselves that not only do we need to heal the pain that exists among us, but also we must literally take back the night, creating safe spaces where women are free of harassment, where they can walk undisturbed and where they are in control of their bodies, their sexuality, themselves.

The work we need to do is both personal and political for women and for men.

We need to examine our behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs about violence against women and the equality of women.

Together we need to break the silence that makes us complicit in injustice.

As women, we need to empower ourselves to have the strength and confidence to say that “no” means “no” and to report any assault against us.

As men, you need to have the strength to be partners and allies to those who are the victims of violence and the courage to call your friends on their sexist and disrespectful behavior.

At the same time, we need to examine and change our institutions – political, social and educational – to make sure that violence against women is never tolerated and never denied.

We need laws that send a clear message that sexual violence is a crime and that perpetrators will be prosecuted and punished as criminals.

We need to speak up and raise the consciousness of our university presidents, chiefs of police, government leaders, judges, fraternities, our fathers, brothers, and friends.

Women and men must do this work – together and separately. So let us amplify the voices of survivors and victims who find the courage to speak up.

We need to transform their pain into questions, demands, and social change.

Women here and throughout the world deserve to be free to walk the dark streets as equals. Only then can the night be truly ours, truly everyone’s.

~ Susanne Dietzel is the director of the Women’s Resource Center and an instructor of women’s studies.