There are many pros and cons to working for your parents. On the good side, you get to be around them all the time. On the bad side, you get to be around them all the time. Also, you can’t call in sick if you’re really not. People think that when they reach a certain age, they can quit obeying their parents. Try doing that when your mom is literally your boss.

Some time ago at our restaurant, she told me to wait on a couple that just walked in. I, however, had an armful of ketchup bottles, and I was already in a pissy mood for one reason or another. So I yelled, “I’m not the only one who works here, Mom!”

Dear God, I felt a disturbance in the force. Did I mention I never yell back at my mom? I ran into the kitchen and was too terrified to come out. Because I was a little stressed, I awoke the beast that is an angry mom.

I wrote my last will and testament on a post-it before walking back out to the dining room. Expectedly, she gave me a stare that could pierce steel. I apologized before she could say anything, and she accepted, but not without a warning.

I hear people my age sass back at their parents all the time. They talk to their folks with disrespect that would get me a slap across the face.

When George Carlin talked about the commandments a few years back, he mentioned that the fourth one, honor thy mother and father, shouldn’t just come naturally. Parents should earn their kids’ respect.

I’m 20 years old. Why the hell do my parents still scare me? Why do I avoid sassing back at them? The answer is simple and probably predictable: I respect them. Sure, we argue sometimes, and we aren’t always the Cleavers or the Bradys. We’re a dysfunctional family from Chalmette, but my parents are still the boss. They gave – and are still giving – so much for me. The least I can do is treat them with the respect they deserve. It’s a give and take deal: I give respect to them and I get some back.

The next time I freak out at work, I just have to make sure I pop in the bathroom to let out some steam before I take it out on someone I love. Or I could just always take it out on a rude customer. Hey, what’s mom going to do about it? Fire me? (Love ya, Mama.)