Picking your location for a Mardi Gras parade is highly important: make one wrong move and you’ll end up without any beads.

Here are some suggestions in choosing the best place on the route.

Children are the spawn of Satan (where parades are concerned).

Sure, they’re cute, but maybe they’re a little too cute. When it comes to parades, a single child has the potential to ruin any chances of you to get anything. Before you assume that the stuffed animal is being waved in your direction, take a look around. There’s probably a kid on his or her dad’s shoulders to your side. Do you really want to be the jerk who takes the toy that was meant for the small, helpless child?

The camping-chairs are off limits.

They’ve probably been marked off, but just to reiterate, they’re off limits. If someone is willing to wait over night to get a few extra beads, let them have the area. Besides, they’re aggressive and won’t let you stand around them, anyway.

Barricades are not parade-friendly.

If you’re blocked in by barricades, it’s not worth it. It doesn’t matter how close you are to the French Quarter; You’re giving up the option of getting right next to the float and harassing the people on the floats. It’s not a rock concert, it’s a parade. There’s no reason for the special VIP treatment.

Befriend those who live where parades go.

If you really want to get something, become friends with someone with an apartment or house on the route. This is especially helpful on St. Charles Avenue, where a single connection can get you a great spot for a majority of the big parades. Not only will you have free access to a bathroom, but you’ll also help the people on the floats test out just how far they can lob those five-pound beads after a few strong drinks. It’s a win-win situation.

Avoid overly enthusiastic out-of-towners.

You know the type: it’s their first time in town and they are super-excited. They’ve already consumed copious amounts of alcohol, so now their sole mission in life is to get some beads. Perhaps they’ve come prepared with a sign, “Came down from (insert town here)! First time at Mardi Gras!” in the hopes of getting some more of those plastic gems. Let them have their fun so they tell their friends back home about how crazy the city is, but stay as far away as possible unless you want to dampen your own good time.

Masako Hirsch can be reached at [email protected].